Friday 4 December 2020

Friendship and Connection

Have Missed taking part in the Five Minute Friday posts!

So writing today for five minutes on the prompt "present." Go!

I've struggled with the meaning of friendships over the years. Wondering if I could put my finger on what my needs are, and what I want to be for others. I know I am deeply loyal and faithful, I care, love blessing my friends and holding space for them. I believe in sitting on the couch, letting your friend cry and loving them in the mess of it all. I believe in connecting, I'm not superficial or surface. I can't be, it's just not me. I'm not intense or crazy, and I only allow a handful of people to be called friend. 

Inevitably though, people claim to look for friendship, but cannot commit to connecting. We as a society, have become afraid of connection. So people stay surface - level. They don't impart the gift of connection, which is my definition of friendship.

Even as I pen these words, I'm struck by a deep revelation. My word for the year - given to me by God - is "connection."

Let me tell you, when I got this word at the beginning of 2020, I was kinda confused. I had no context or words, no frame of reference for the word connection. Now, some 10 months later in a Covid world, I have so much context for the word connection. I'm also now aware that my friendships have to come with connection. If they don't, I struggle with it and that's okay too. It is our presence and our ability to go deeper than the surface that can cause a friend to become more than an acquaintance, I believe this is where true friendship begins....


Linking with Five Minute Friday 



  1. I hear you! And I think a lot of us have reconsidered what connection means this year.

    Amie, FMF #13

    1. Hey Amie, yeah it's so true! Was unexpected for all of us, but has been good to reflect on.

  2. You inspired word for 2020 has much meaning! We long for connection. I find it most in the times I spend praying with family and friends.I'm your neighbor at #FMF

    1. Hi Carol! Nice to meet you, it's so true that we long for connection, I also find it spending time with friends and family. Sounds like our love language might be quality time :)

  3. My friends now mostly fall away,
    for which there's simple answer;
    they really do not want to stay,
    and watch me die of cancer,
    to hear my laboured painful breath,
    to help me to my feet,
    for it reminds them of the death
    that they may one day meet.
    And so I, smiling, let them go,
    with words of praise and blessing,
    but you and me, we both know
    that I'd lie by not confessing
    that when they're gone, I feel the lack,
    and wish they might one day come back.

    My word for 2020 was 'whatever', which did seem to fit. For 2021 it's "Dude!"

    #1 at FMF this week

    1. Hey Andrew! Good to see you again - I LOVE this poem you wrote and wow - it really sucks knowing that friends can leave just because you are dying of cancer. I've read loads of your posts about your journey and it seems so stranger to consider how people can treat us sometimes. Thank you for being real and open. May God bless you richly!

  4. I believe you are SO right. #7

  5. There are many kinds of connections. but there is only one or two soul-friends. In history the Celtic Christians were powerful in understanding this. They called in "anamchara" or soul-friend. This word can only be explained as a close friend, comrade, and confidant. As you so profoundly explain.......not shallow. Thanks for the reminder.

    1. Hi Chris, wow I just googled this and read some of JOhn O'Donohue's words and work on this, it's so deep and profound. I would say I'm blessed to have 1 or 2 of these friends in my life. And my heart / soul knows the difference between the others. I guess that's also why I feel so much discontent sometimes around the friends that don't seem to have that deep connection. This was a lovely thing to learn today - thanks so much for sharing.

  6. I'm so happy to hear God gave you your word for the year as connection. Thank you so very much for sharing your words, so very well spoken. Blessings.
    Visit from FMF#9

    1. Blessings in abundance, was so crazy that God gave me this word for 2020, little did I know what was going to happen, but again shows just how loved we are - He is always showing us He cares. May He bless you today!